Saturday, April 28, 2012

GOOD BYE APRIL HELLO MAY

Ok so im getting ahead of myself somewhat but not really may is going to be here on tuesday. Time flys by so fast and i feel as though i havent made so much progress. But thats all in my head and thaughts like these are the ones that hurt my journey sooo i will sit here and reflect upon my journey and see how far i have come.

So i was suppose to weigh in on Friday but guess what i moved it to tuesday....I will know at what weight i will be starting May and asses how i well or bad i did in april that way i will reflect and see what changes i can make and all that good stuff.

On another note ***u dont have to read this but i thougth i would put how i have been feeling lately***

I feel that my body is starting to slow down, im so close to reaching what i had set for myself to reach 130lbs and even though i push myself and i try and do everything right i feel like my body or at this point my mind is right on the edge of giving up. I have alot more lazy days than i normally do i dont allow myself to have them but i have to constantly fight with my mind and tell it that this is for my own good and i will not give up. Some times i realize i need to change things up in order to not have to struggle with a plateau but its so hard especially when you are in love with your workout scheduale and your eating schedule and the results they have provided. But i think its finally time for me to switch things up but i dont know how. I love the eliptical and hate the tredmill and even though i know i should push myself to try something new and strengthen myself in all areas. But i feel that when i dont enjoy the workout im more likely to give up or try and come up with any excuse to skip it. WHAT TO DO??? ill see how this last week and a half of school go and once i get home ill try new things such as running outside or starting workout videos ive been thinking of combining Insanity and 30 day shred. and this is only because i have no gym access back at home.

omg talking about gym access my friend back home the one friend who has always been the big girl just like me. ( a liitle bit about her she lost weight our senior year of high school and to be truthful i was jelouse she had so much attention and suddenly i was the only big girl in the group. However she started gaining weight throughout the last 2 years ) During spring break i went to see her and she didnt mention anything to me but my brother came home and was like ooo she was talking to one of your other friends about how you lost so much weight and that you look so different. That made me feel so good i dont know why but just knowing that people notice make this journey all worth it. But than on the other hand this might sound selfish but what ever this is the way i feel and i cant help it, she suddently after seeing me she want to lose weight too. But she has decided she suddenlty out of no where cares about animals and wants to become a vegan WTF. And than she messages me randomly and is like o i really want someone to workout with this summer we should be workout buddies. And to be truthful i said yes but at the same time i love working out by myself i have time to listen to my music and clear my head and push myself to my fullest. but when you are with someone else they are talking to you and than when they want to go ahead and do something else you feel obligated to go with them or at least slow down especially if you two are running together. IDK if i like this whole workout buddy but ill give it a try and see how it goes.

This post was super long sorry...hope you all have an awesome weekend enjoy the last couple of days left in Apirl and let make May count

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